Same style ≠ same page

Oct 9

📚💡➡️🚀 Stop being an “armchair influencer.” Join the dojo. Wax on, wax off, DiSC on. 🥋🎯

In my workshops, someone always assumes that if two people have the same DiSC communication style, they’ll automatically get along.

Same language, same pace, same priorities—must be smooth sailing, right?

Logical, but untrue.

In fact, I’ve seen some of the biggest personality clashes happen between people with the same DiSC style.

Ever seen two D Styles get in power struggles (because of their driving need for control)?
Ever seen two C Styles get in a logic battle (because they both need to be right)?
Two S styles not saying the hard thing to each other (because of their need for harmony)?
Two i Styles compete for attention (because of their need for recognition)?

With these similarities often come similar needs, blind spots, and stress responses – fertile ground for friction.

Let’s break down how this tension shows up between each style:

Tension: Power struggles, control battles, competing agendas.
Why: Both want to lead. Both hate being told what to do.
How it shows up: Constant push-pull, interruptions, one-upping.
What to do: Get aligned early on roles and responsibilities. Respect each other’s turf—and don’t fight fire with fire.

Tension: Competing for attention, enthusiasm overload, lack of follow-through.
Why: Both want to be heard, liked, and spontaneous. Details… not so much.
How it shows up: Great energy at first—until ideas clash, or no one follows through.
What to do: Decide who’s leading what. Build in structure (yes, even a little) so things don’t stay stuck in brainstorm mode.

Tension: Avoidance of hard conversations, resentment buildup, indecision.
Why: Both avoid conflict, prioritize harmony, and defer to each other.
How it shows up: Passive-aggressive tension, slow progress, emotional bottlenecks.
What to do: Agree to have the hard conversations—gently. Set decision deadlines and stick to them.

Tension: Perfectionism wars, nitpicking, analysis paralysis.
Why: Both want to be right—and have the data to prove it.
How it shows up: Logic battles, endless revisions, “my method is better than yours.”
What to do: Clarify the goal. Agree on “good enough.” Remember: efficiency is also a kind of excellence.

Friction isn’t just a difference thing. It’s a similarity thing, too.

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