Sure, no problem

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Ever said yes before you even had a chance to think?

I do this all the time.

It’s a problem.

I need to work on myself.

My DiSC communication style includes some strong “S,” Supportive tendencies. This means I want to be helpful. I want you to like me. I want things to go smoothly. One of my more dominant human needs is harmony.

So when someone asks, “Can you take this on?” I reflexively blurt out “Sure, no problem.”

Then I go home, stew in resentment, and blame them for taking advantage — when really, I betrayed myself.

I wasn’t being kind. I was being avoidant.

I prioritized short-term harmony over long-term clarity. And that’s not generous — it’s selfish.

Worse, when I stuff it down long enough, I eventually snap. Then I say things I regret.

Brené Brown says: “Clear is kind. Unclear is unkind.”

Here’s what kindness from an S Style should look like:

• “I’d like to help, but I need to check my workload first.”

• “Can I get back to you tomorrow? I want to give you a thoughtful answer.”

• “I want to support you, but I can’t say yes to this and still deliver on my current priorities.”

This might feel selfish at first. It’s not.

It’s emotionally honest. And it gives the other person something solid to work with.

One of the things my “D,” Direct style colleagues have told me is that it’s hard for them to know where I stand.

If your “yes” is automatic, it’s probably not honest. Practice pausing before responding. Speak on the level of needs.

You can’t support your team if you’re silently stewing.

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